Yesterday was meant to be the day I post up my weekly Blog but I am a day late. Usually on Tuesdays, I have nearly completed writing it and I am just editing it before posting. This week, however, I have been lost for ideas, or more I am not even sure what to write about. One of the many thoughts I've had around writing this Blog was the fact that people aren’t even reading it. So a part of me was thinking, "What a waste of time, there’s no benefits in doing it, so why am I bothering?' Then I had to remind myself that sometimes we do things not for others' benefit but for our own. I made a commitment to myself to post weekly for a year. So that's exactly what I plan to do. Plus I can't write 4 Blogs, not market or give it much exposure and expect a ton of traffic can I? Also nothing we do the majority of the time is easy but the more we chip away at it the better we get. What will I gain from writing these Blogs? My writing will improve, I’ll learn more about myself, I'll learn about another platform to share what I do on and maybe, just maybe, one of my Blogs will help someone one day. Either way if I stop now what do I learn? I’ll learn that I gave up before I even begun. That’s not really in line with my theme for the year of ‘Passionately Failing Towards Success’ is it? So to stop or give up now is just NOT an option.
When I reflect on my life and what it takes to succeed I realise it isn’t an easy road. A lot of the time it’s this constant struggle and questioning of my own abilities, direction and priorities. Then through those struggles and questioning I learn and increase in my skills, experiences and abilities. Then it’s dealing with other people’s constant devaluing of my abilities and worth. Then it is learning to ignore those people and continue forward regardless of the judgements. We try to do things that we have absolutely no idea how to do, but needs to be done. Then we have to learn all along the way how to do it and then improve in doing it. For example running my Kristyl the DRAMA Queen Facebook page has been a journey. It’s been hard, confusing, a little emotional with unneeded pressure at times. I still haven’t quite figured out how to use my page to its potential and capacity. However I have stuck at it for many years and I am learning so much all along the way. It’s also offered me a space and platform to share my thoughts with thousands of people all around the world. That's pretty cool.
Years ago I would stay in my comfort zone a lot more than I do now. Once a week I would do something that would push past my comfort zone and I would stay in that space for a while. I’d be in that space until that uncomfortableness became comfortable and normal again. So although it was hard at times that feeling was only short-lived and momentary. However for the last 4 years I have consistently pushed myself multiple times a day outside my comfort zone. Pushing past my limits of comfortability and into the unknown. When you put yourself in a situation where you are rejected a lot, where you are doing things you don’t even know how to do, where you are failing a lot of the times. That's hard. When you have reached a new territory so have no prior experience to connect or anchor yourself too, and you are confused what to do next? Well yes it can sometimes do a number on your mental health. It's hard to keep pushing and to keep going when your not seeing the fruition of your labours.
However taking relentlessly action daily, pushing myself outside my comfort zone, being willing to fail bigger, taking on larger projects, putting myself out there more, running a business, creating shows, performing and so much more has 10x my progress. I have grown, gained skills, increased my talents and knowledge more in the last 4 years than the previous 35 years. It is doing things even when we don't see any progress. It is believing in ourselves when no one else does. It is completing something even when we don't see the benefits straight away or even years later. Just like a tiny water droplet over time can crack a large boulder in half. It is not through sheer force but through its persistence. As we continue to stay consistent in taking action on our goals, we will see changes. We just need to remember all the other areas of knowledge and skills we are learning and gaining in the process. The only time we won't see progress is when we give up.
Photography Credit: Florence Charvin
Our life is like a journey - going directions we don't always know where they will take us - but it is at the end of the journey and what we do "there" - that is where we can measure our level of success.