Navigating Family Gatherings

Family gatherings can be a rollercoaster. Sometimes they're full of laughter and great memories, but they can also be draining, stressful, and overwhelming. After just having a recent family event, I’m reminded how tricky these occasions can be, especially with all the traveling, different personalities, and expectations. Here are a few things I’ve learned that might help navigate the chaos next time.

1. Just Be Yourself

It’s easy to fall into the trap of trying to be what others expect you to be during family events. But honestly, it’s way more relaxing if you just show up as you are. When you’re authentic, it’s easier to connect, and it gives others the permission to do the same. Plus, it’s a lot less stressful than pretending to be someone you're not. Just enjoy the moments, even if they’re imperfect.

2. Take Care of Yourself (Mentally, Emotionally, and Financially)

Let’s face it: family events can be exhausting, especially if there's a lot of travel involved. Make sure to check in with yourself before the event. If you need a quiet moment, go for a walk or take a break in a separate room—don’t feel guilty for taking care of your mental space. Emotionally, it’s okay to not be “on” all the time. And financially, family gatherings can get pricey. If you’re traveling or chipping in for group expenses, set some limits so you don’t end up stressing about the bill later.

3. Know When to Take a Break

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, it’s totally fine to step away for a few minutes. Whether it’s stepping outside for a breath of fresh air or just sitting alone for a few moments, taking breaks gives you the space to reset. It's not a sign of weakness—it’s just smart self-care. And encouraging others to take breaks can help create a more relaxed, understanding environment for everyone.

4. Lower Your Expectations of Others

We all go into family events with certain hopes—whether it’s that everyone will behave a certain way or that there will be deep, meaningful conversations. But here’s the thing: not everyone is going to meet those expectations. People will be themselves, for better or worse. And sometimes, that's not what we want or hope for. Lowering your expectations about how others will act can save you a lot of frustration. If you let go of the idea that people need to behave the way you expect, you’ll end up enjoying things a lot more.

5. Be Present: Focus on What’s Happening Right Now

It’s easy to get caught up in past family drama or worry about how things are “supposed” to go. But if you can let go of that and just be present, you’ll probably enjoy yourself a lot more. Engage with the people around you, share stories, and appreciate the little moments. Family gatherings aren’t about making everything perfect; they’re about being in the moment and making memories as you go.

6. Be Mindful of Your Energy and Attitude

It’s easy to get caught up in your own perspective and forget that your energy, tone, and attitude can really impact the people around you. If you’re feeling tense, judgmental, or just plain off, it shows. People pick up on that, and it can create an atmosphere that’s more negative or stressful than it needs to be. If you can sense that your mood is affecting others, take a step back and adjust your approach. It’s not about being perfect—it’s about being aware that your attitude can either uplift or drain those around you. So, if you find yourself getting caught up in negativity, try shifting your mindset, lightening the tone, and letting go of any unnecessary judgments. We all have our flaws, and acknowledging that can go a long way in creating a more relaxed, positive environment for everyone.

Family gatherings can be draining, but they’re also a chance to reconnect, make new memories, and share experiences—flaws and all. So next time you’re heading into one of those crazy family weekends, take a deep breath, lower your expectations, and focus on being present. It’s not about getting it all right; it’s about the moments that make up the bigger picture.